It’s hard for me to write about you – it’s more of an escape I fantasize.
In a lapse of time – now I am loosing you.
Giving my life to the future to forget you.
When I try and think about you- I stay
I take a chance to feel myself indulging in a deep wave of nausea.
I follow my eyes to the other side –
To another place where my breasts will still smell of your golden hair.
I wish you were here lying next to me-
Feeling me falling out of love.
Watching me depart towards something else.
Maybe then we could decide that you no longer want me there by your side.
I loved you –
But at the same time sin loved me too.